The day I got kicked out of Target

But, not really.

Most people know my love for Target. I went through a stage where I went there a few times a week, heck almost daily probably. But today, I want to share with you the day the earth stood still and I had.to.stop. Annnnndddd, go.

My side of the story.

Walking around, minding my dear own business. Sippin' on some delicious Fountain Mountain and enjoying my quiet two year old while she chomps on some popcorn. Did I mention she's being quiet?

Heaven. 

 Wee!

So we mosey our way to the children section (First mistake) bumping ever so lightly into the clothing racks because c'mon they're way to close anyways. Let's all agree to that can't we?
So I turn the corner, so close to the finish line out of the freakin' claustrophobic maze that is the Target children clothing section and *tap* yes, the teeniest, tiniest tap that anyone could make. I did.

BOOM

No joke.

Alright, it was just one rack (and a half) I looked up and some lady just smiled at me and I may or may not have dropped the f bomb, silently because well, my two year old was quiet and people would have heard me. I tried to pick it up, really but this piece of crap wouldn't for the life of me stand and well people were starting to look.
So I double stepped it to the nearest employee I could find... This is when it gets bad, no judgment okay? Are we swinging in the tree of trust right now? Yes, Okay.. I warned you.

"Hi um, my daughter just pulled on a rack and it came crashing down, I tried to pick it up but the rack can't stand up"

Yeah I threw my daughter, my heart and soul, the child from my loins..well not really, c section here, so.. the child who I let ruin my ab muscles-- under the bus. What?
 
I don't think he even listened, he heard crash and went running so I went on my merry way. What the heck else do you want me to do? So I went to the Halloween department, cussing myself out for wearing a V-neck because now my hives were extremely visible. Awesome, just awesome. I also apologized to my daughter and told her I'd buy her some candy. She just ate her popcorn and laughed at me.

Again. 

Awesome.

I throw some stupid Reeses no bake brownie something or other mix into my cart because well, now I had to buy something. I figured it was time to go (thank GOD) I'd made my way around the store and had to peek and see if they cleaned it up so as I'm walking by.. WHAT do I hear? Two employees talking... ABOUT ME! And, I quote...
"Yeah she pushed it over and ran off on PURPOSE. Seriously it took him hours to fix it and like five people to clean it up. It's broken now, she didn't even offer to help or pay for it."

Um, alright.
1.) Maybe it was broken first and that's why my tap pushed it over.
2.) I did try to help, home boy ran off before I could add any other assistance.
3.) Hours? Okay I know I'm slow and out of shape but my pity lap around Target was minutes, not hours.
4.) Forget you, I was probably the biggest highlight to the WEEK, if not MONTH thank you very much. You're welcome for the gossip.

*Snaps across the face*

Giiiiirl. 

End scene. 

So there you go, I didn't get kicked out but I didn't show my face for a while, luckily there was another store across town that I could get my fountain mountain and quiet baby fix.

Target, if you're reading this go ahead and email me for gift card compensations for my suffering.

And the five pounds I gained from Reeces no bake pity purchase.